I will love you if I never see you again, and I will love you if I see you every Tuesday.
Lemony Snicket, The Beatrice Letters
I have so much of you in my heart.
Because that, as far as I understand it, is real love. I don’t think that anyone has ever loved me like that, and I don’t even know yet whether or not you do, but after three years of Chuck-and-Blair style cat and mouse, after me telling you countless times that I didn’t want just a hook-up and to come back to me if you wanted something real, after me shooting you down when you did, after you telling me that I was the only one you wanted to be with and that you’d wait for me for a year while I disappeared to the developing world, after me pushing you away yet again and telling you that there was someone else, and after you still coming back for me, I’m starting to wonder if you do actually love me like that.
Don’t get stuck. Move, travel, take a class, take a risk. There is a season for wildness and a season for settledness, and this is neither. This season is about becoming. Don’t lose yourself at happy hour, but don’t lose yourself on the corporate ladder either. Stop every once in a while and go out to coffee or climb in bed with your journal. Now is your time. Walk closely with people you love. Don’t get stuck in the past, and don’t try to fast-forward yourself into a future you haven’t yet earned. Give today all the love and intensity and courage you can, and keep travelling honestly along life’s path.
You get in the biggest fights with the people you care about the most because those are the relationships you’re willing to fight for.
The Love Whisperer
And if you do, will you tell me about it? Because if you really love me, in a love-you-on-rainy-Tuesday, love-you-when-you’re-being-impossible, love-you-more-because-of-everything-we’ve-been-through kind of way, I need to know.
And so I pose my original question. Do you love me? No, do you really love me? Do you love me despite the number of times I’ve flung your heart at the wall? Do you you love me despite how terrified of being loved I am? Do you love me in spite of me?
Self-confidence and self-love come from within. You can’t love another person so hard that your perception of them seeps into their subconscious and affects how they view themselves.
I go for someone who is a little brooding and somebody you can have a good conversation with, a good fight with, who will always keep you guessing and make you laugh. And he has to have good shoes.